While having breakfast, Jaeden diverted our conversation with a question as to why he was named that way. “WHY NOT MAXIMUS, Mom? I like to be called Max”, he exclaimed. Unguardedly, I didn’t know that such an audible blow can elicit vivid recollections of deep rooted memories. Mental images verging on life transitions suchlike that day of my debut, start of pregnancy but this one in particular struck me most upon recalling. I was scheduled for a sonogram, three weeks prior giving birth and surprisingly found out, im having a boy when initial results predicted that the life inside me was a girl.
Marveled by flashbacks, this is what I told my son: “My love, I could’ve named you Maximus but you were named Jaeden because it means “God has answered my prayer” and your second name, Matthew ? It means you’re a “Gift from God”. Now, do you still wana be called Max? Jaeden: No, I love Jaeden, mom. It’s beautiful. Is it why I get gifts from you all the time cause you named me that way? I leaned closer, kissed his forehead and patted his tushie so as to end the conversation.
I should have said this but rather saved it for his 21st or Wedding day. “Among all the boys in the world, I’m glad that heavens gave me you to be my son cause you are exactly the kid i have dreamt to have long before you were conceived. To have you mixed and made beautifully entailed with a brave character to complement my emotional weakness.” God indeed grant my wishes and unending prayers. I didn’t sign up for doing laundries, overwhelming parent teacher meetings, a collection of detention slips and a headlock hug suffocating me in the middle of the night but I’m grateful being in this crazy beautiful journey of single parenting. In point of fact, Motherhood did not change me, IT MADE ME.